All I get is Lager and a Nasty Little Rash

Here's Rashid's latest post. I must work with this man more, he seems to be on my wave length...For a cunt.

what a twenty four hours... from the opening ceremony and euphoria of the opening game to that fumble.
johannesburg was gridlocked on friday forcing everyone out of their cars and across what is viewed as one of the worlds most dangerous cities on foot. Though to be honest all anybody said to me on that particular journey was "Can you feel it brother. It is here...." the atmosphere for south africa's opener at the fanpark in central joburg was epic to say the least. my ears were still ringing the next morning when i got the newspapers with their self congratulatory headlines.. it seems that this will be the best and most profitable world cup ever. but they always say that dont they? The police caught the guys who robbed a set of journalists within twenty four hours and promptly announced it wasn't south africans at all but zimbabweans and nigerians. so thats alright then. all looked good for englands opener....
within 5 minutes of kick off we were a goal up and looked alright, ok some of the players couldnt keep the new ball down at that altitude but even lennon seemed able to a do a bit more than simply scare people by running at them with his tiny little legs. then it seemed we had run up against african magic in some perverted form.
in south africa it is common for league teams to perform magic rites to ensure victory but it seems that some americans had visited the sangoma for a few spells. maybe the slippy hands spell or the make the keeper look like a twat special. or maybe one of the fans has unleashed the awesome power of the fabled tokoloshe.
a widespread belief in these parts is in evil demons called tokoloshe which if harnessed correctly can give the "owner" vast power. generally described being small and smelly but with an enourmous cock that is near enough the same length as his small body, people (especially rural people) still have great faith in these and other things of the shadow world. they are always trying to have sex with women and are sometimes cited in divorce proceedings. sounds like certain footballers i could mention. anyway these things will work for you and damage your enemies (American tokoloshe theory) but will also fuck you up at the first opportunity (Greens tokoloshe fucked him over theory). either that or Danielle Lloyd is a tokoloshe and we just havent noticed. think about it, shes had sex with just about everybody....
anyway i have decided to try and get over this by watching the dutch and danes try and deal with the fucking vuvuzela tomorrow at soccer city. i have to say that the english made one song heard above that noise last night. one song.....